.Thursday, October 6, 2011 ' 1:20 AM Y
i can't deny that i don't love to be beauty?
I miss you:(
No one will truly understand the pain I had until now, moving on is easier to be said than done, I've been trying so hard so hard but I think I failed again. Trying my best to hold back my tears every single moment, trying my best to not think of you, keeping all to me, the memories. I don't wish to think, but I can't. I used to have you to say everything, how I feel even when we had... But now you disappear in my life, you is you, me is me. I start to bottled up, not saying anything to anyone, i don't know how to say, so I cried, all I knew is cry. Acting strong infront of everyone, saying that I'm alright, but am I really okay? I doubt myself.
.Sunday, September 25, 2011 ' 2:45 PM Y
i can't deny that i don't love to be beauty?
I learnt how to keep everything towards myself,i told myself that i must stand up again,but sometimes it's just so hard so hard.Every single day,i would think of you,sometimes i asked myself if i would start a new and try again,the answer is no,i'm too afraid of being hurt again,i've phobia now.Everyone told me that you must be hurt alot of times before you would find the one that's right,i asked myself,can i?one time is really enough,i don't have the courage.I'm still waiting for you,i'm still waiting.
.Saturday, September 10, 2011 ' 1:55 PM Y
i can't deny that i don't love to be beauty?
I've been trying so hard to hide the pain in my heart,always trying so hard to,to heal the wound or even shut it with a door not to think about it,putting a strong cover over it, telling myself nothing had happened!But i seems to fail, fail in doing so,thinking of you,the memories we had, i collaspe once again.i know i shouldn't been living in the past,but moving on is not as easy as reading ABC.Especially today! i saw you, i saw you!!!!why must i see you?????????i really don't know why.my karma is here, i've suffer and i had enough,why must you still appear infront of me,what make it worst is you not even have the courage to look at me,i should be the one not you.i should be the one who feel guilty,but now there's not a need already.I'll never forget the harsh words you said to me, it's hurt me so deeply than you thought,靠树，树倒，靠人，人跑。
.Sunday, August 14, 2011 ' 10:10 PM Y
i can't deny that i don't love to be beauty?
I'm really very sad,
no words can really describe what i'm feeling now,
Gohonzoh, direct me, tell me which way to chose.
A. Happiness depends on one decision, and everything will be fine,
but are you willing, willing to give me this, no you are not.
i wanted so much to let go, but i can't. i failed, i'm a failure.
i know you are not willing yet i keep ask,
seems like i'm shameless and making myself so worthless.
it's all my fault. but i can't control, you just don't understand where you weigh in me.
B. No happiness at all, will be hurting myself even deeply but able to satisfy others' need,
Win-win solution for all, no more struggling, you are free, someone else will be very happy.
but i'm no going to be happy at all, i must force myself so hard to accept and change, cannot make myself happy but make all happy. when chosen, it's final and there's no u-turn.
i'm such a failure, i hate myself for unable to accept,
i hate myself not able to let go,
i hate myself for being so weak,
if i can accept it, things wouldn't be this way.
i hate to see you this way because of me,
i hate us being this way yet i can't do anything,
maybe B is the best choice for all of us,
then you won't suffer and i won't bother you anymore.
but why do a YES so difficult to say now.
i shouldn't appear in your life,
am i right?
.Monday, August 8, 2011 ' 9:36 PM Y
i can't deny that i don't love to be beauty?
i'm trying my best to let go, i believe i can. totally awake from my dream, back to reality again.
.Wednesday, August 3, 2011 ' 10:45 PM Y
i can't deny that i don't love to be beauty?
如果你问我现在怎样，我只会对你说难过。是我不够潇洒。
.Tuesday, July 19, 2011 ' 8:49 AM Y
i can't deny that i don't love to be beauty?
我会坚强， 我会努力不让眼泪流下来。我会努力维护我受伤的心灵，我不会再依赖你，你自由了。
